#geekpoem for GEEK2013 – Game Expo East Kent
A crowdsourced poem all about videogames and geek culture created for Game Expo East Kent – or GEEK2013 – created over February 2013. Look below for a recording of the poem and the final piece!
Geek Poem (or, When Guybrush Met Lara)
Gaming’s been around since time began
tradition meets new technology
the computer chip meets art
Blue Shell meets the first player in Mario Kart.
Guybrush meets Lara
makes his best move:
“Roses are #FF0000 (red)
violets are #0000FF (blue)
all my base are belong to you.”
They insult sword fight
she fights like a dairy farmer
he like a Manic Miner
a playful Grim Fandango
because they’re both elite
yet not attacking for the kill
this is not a Day of Defeat.
They play all day
giggling, flirting, meeting eyes
laugh like demented dentists
winning each other as a prize.
Then the big boss man appears
crashing through the Streets (of Rage)
a giant bowser with metal fists
a hardcore final stage.
They scream and run
racing side by side
scaling up a building
they try to hide.
Round a corner Guybrush went
and feeling his power pellet spent
says “My health is low, my spells undone.
Help me: do I Attack, Summon, Item, Run?”
He hides further away, Lara takes point
fighting the boss one-on-one
though he is a monster
she has a minigun.
Bowser lumberjack punches
Lara jumps, times it wrong
gets knocked back like in Pong
but counterstrikes the Juggernaut
climbing up on his back
gives his shell a mighty thwack
a perfect hit! – or so she thought
but adamantine is hard to crack.
She continues to invade his space
looking for his weakest place
repetitive beats on the predator
till dodging attacks becomes a chore.
Guybrush does some magic secretly
gets lost in other worlds completely
and with a command by his hands
unlocks a spectrum of gaming lands
shaking heroes from unconnected worlds
Jet Set Willy, Mario, Ezio Auditore
Ewoks, Turtles, Pac-Man, Furby
like a platform cross-over beat-em-up
or some cosplayers meeting up.
And like in Civilisation
(where three privateers
can destroy a battleship)
many heroes can start to chip
at the bowser’s health bar.
Mario passes Lara a power star
she becomes more dangerous
and with a winning yell
smashes through the villain’s shell.
She throws a single grenade
right into his heart
Lara quips: “I’m sorry you had to die”
whispers almost silently: “and the cake is a lie.”
Then on a rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle
she escapes from certain Doom
lands on her feet as the explosion rocks
the city from room to room.
sending the heroes back home
leaving Guybrush and Lara
at last, finally, alone.
Guybrush says to Lara
“you’re my everything now”
she looks at him, seriously, and says
“how appropriate: you fight like a cow.”
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